DESTINY OVER FEAR
“Some people die at 25 and aren’t buried until 75” – Benjamin Franklin
What does that exactly mean?
To be frankly honest, it can be put into several contexts but what immediately came to my attention was that we enter this Earth with unlimited power. The ability to transform any vision into reality, there are no boundaries in our mind on what it is we can exponentially achieve. Our greatest ability is the ability to love and care which enables us to do and achieve anything.
“It is in our moments of decision that shapes our destiny” – Anthony Robbins
This world can do with more with leaders that will stand for what’s good, entrepreneurs that will create the next giant businesses that can revolutionize things as we know it, scientist that will come across new discovery that can enhance the lives of humanity, teachers that will spark the mind of our children in a creative way that’s never been done before…
However, we end not fulfilling any destiny we could have chosen for ourselves because of fear. Instead you choose to conform to the rules created by society. You’re afraid of the risk that’s been attached to your destiny so decide not to act. How can you still hold on to your unlimited power with a limited mind such as that?
Fear is what ages and kills people as it leads to the next common emotion… regret. What’s the benefit of that? What’s the benefit of not fulfilling your dream. You’ll find when you’re fearful, your frequency drops at a dreadful level. This weakens your immune system (affecting your health) and doesn’t help you work efficiently and effectively to reach your dream.
Imagine if you were on your deathbed, and standing around you are the different ghost of your future that all live these different amazing realities. They’ve all shared the same pain and obstacle that you have. They just made different decision to you which has helped them evolve into the beings that are standing before you.
Staring at you with resentment, they utter these haunting words at your final moment before you pass away, ‘we were waiting for your arrival, only you could have given us life and now we must be buried with you.’
You decided not to take chances… (Inspired by Dr. Howard Thurman)
If you were to pass away today, what would pass away with you because of allowance of fear to stop you.
A research study reveals that we do have short-lived regrets for the boloney things we did, however those regrets fade shortly after. But the regrets for the things we haven’t done – those last for years.
A team of researchers from Cornell University asked those in their seventies, “what would you differently if you can live your life over again?” Four times as many people replied they wish they could have acted on the things they haven’t.
We could probably guess they didn’t act because of fear of not being liked or judged. You’ll find that your perception of fear and the reality of fear are two separate entity. For example:
You’re not afraid of people around you. You’re afraid of rejection.
You’re not afraid of trying again. You’re afraid of getting hurt for the same reason again.
You’re not afraid of love. You’re afraid of being loved because you haven’t learnt to love yourself first.
See the pattern? Fear stems from the meaning you give to something in your life which will cause you to feel it and that’s the level of thinking you’ll act from.
“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”
It’s the minority that understand this then act that will continue to fulfil their destiny regardless of how much they’re overlooked, ridiculed or thought to be strange. “If it was easy, everybody would do it.” Everyone would be pursuing their dream but it’s not. You must demonstrate you want it before you can have it through resilience.
“Nothing happens until the pain of remaining the same outweighs the pain of change.”
Or in this case scenario, the fear of change. The minority that continue to win understand transformation cannot happen without self-mastery and self-education which starts with self-awareness.
Your brain is decades old. It’s been designed to help you survive, not to take risks. The problem with that is your brain cannot differentiate real danger and fake danger. For example, a dog wants to attack you so instantly your brain will go into survival mode and your fight or flight system will activate. What will you do? RUN!
Now a different case scenario can be:
You will be presenting a presentation at a meeting but you’re nervous because of what you’re focused on and the meaning you’re giving this focus. Your brain will take notice of this emotion and think you’re in danger. Your fight or flight system will then activate. What will you do? RUN!
These are two separate scenarios, right? But your brain cannot differentiate the difference though.
You need to transform your negative self-talk into positive self-talk. Search for excitement in things you’ve never experienced rather than what can go wrong.
“I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul.”
William Ernest Henley
When Nelson Mandela was sentenced to life in prison. Through the 27 years of serving in prison. He experienced interesting transformation in his thought pattern which led him to being freed and leading as the South African president.
For 10 years, his self-talk was, “I’ll never get out of here.” After 10 years he questioned his circumstance, “maybe I can get out of here?” Then the powerful question was asked, “how could I get out of here?” He found a way.
You are in a similar dilemma. Prisoned for life by fear. Rather than strengthening the barrier holding you back by being reactive and constantly blaming others or your environment. How can you be as responsive as Nelson Mandela? What should you be focused on to overcome your fear or face it?
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear. But the triumph over it.”
You’ll find it takes someone with courage to face their fear and do it anyway in a world which is much easier to run away from our problems. Those who face their fear experience the greatest transformation and acquire the qualities and skills required to propel for the life they want.
“Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, your values become your destiny.”
Stop consuming information around you. Begin believing and creating the life you want for yourself and those around you. Be the change you want to see, however you can’t if you’re coming from a place of fear.
There was man that went by name Viktor Frankl. He was a Jewish psychiatrist that was captured and imprisoned by the Nazi. He was tortured and his freedom stripped from him but there was one thing nobody could take from him… his mind. He started focusing on the one freedom he had. Visualising as though he was standing at a pulpit giving a lecture about the “psychology of death camps,” before an audience of 200 student whilst being tortured and beaten.
50 years later from that day when he visualised, Free. Viktor Frankl received an ovation before an audience of 7000, delivering the exact same speech.
Visualise your dreams, I’ll share techniques on that on the next technique. Think about this for now, what is it you’re really scared of? What’s the worst that can happen if you face it now? What’s the best thing that can happen if you face it? Why should you face this fear?
Begin journaling and start raising your awareness each time you experience fear. Write it all down and look for the patterns and do something about it.
“The way I look at life, Tony, we all have something we want, something that represents a greater quality of life. But to get there, you must go through a jungle filled with challenge. If you pass through it, you get to the life you desire. It’s like I’m on one side of the jungle.”
Ray Dalio told Tony Robbins from MTG
You have that same decision to make too. Which one will you choose?
“If you always do what you did, you will always get what you always got.” – Albert Einstein